Planning a Bar or Bat Mitzvah during the Coronavirus pandemic requires parents to consider a whole host of new issues and concerns. Social distancing, food service, payment schedules and out of town guests are just a few of the concerns that have recently been discussed on Mitzvah Market’s 17 regional Bar Bat Mitzvah planning groups on Facebook.
“I worry about venues and vendors going under; making a kid practice for something that’s now a year away; whether or not 14-year-olds will still like Coke and Pepsi; and if we will even want the same kind of event next May that we had planned for this one,” summed up one parent. Thousands of families are all in the same boat, and these groups have become the go-to resource for parents to share information, ideas and sometimes, just to vent.
See below for the top fears and worries of parents who are currently planning their simchas.
Date Changes:
◊ Will our Bar or Bat Mitzvah actually happen on the date we planned?
◊ It’s already keeping me up at night. We’ve moved our party from May 30 to August 30… I’m really not sure it’s going to happen at all.
◊ The farther we move the party from the service, the sillier it feels to me. I am not going to do them in separate years. If I don’t keep changing my date, I’ll never get my deposits back. Also, what will it look like when finally it happens? So many questions.
◊ My son’s Bar Mitzvah is in November and I’m not really sure how to proceed with a party. I don’t know if we’ll be able to have one then, so right now I have nothing planned.
◊ We changed our May date to end of November. That was Plan B. Now we’re working on Plan C, the party in the spring. I feel it truly won’t be comfortable until then. My fear is Plan D. By then my daughter’s friends may be different, except for a few life long friends.
◊ We have already rescheduled and now it looks like our new date won’t be happening either. I told my daughter if we have to reschedule again, we can have it in December instead: a Chris-Mitzvah! (We are an interfaith family.)
Vendors and Finances:
◊ Money. I have just enough saved to throw a nice (but not crazy) party, but the economy is taking a huge downturn. We don’t have a lot of other savings.
◊ If I plan for a January Bar Mitzvah and then we are quarantined again and I have to cancel, I will lose so much money!
◊ Will all of my vendors survive all of this (no one sick, no one bankrupt)?
◊ I have concerns about my vendors. I’ve paid some of them half. What happens if they go under or we can’t do it on the rescheduled date?
Guests, Travel and Social Distancing:
◊ What if we move forward with our child’s celebration, but no one shows up (due to fear)?
◊ Will my out of town friends and relatives feel comfortable traveling?
◊ Can I still have the amount of people that we originally planned or do we need to cut the list?
◊ Will my family be able to fly from out of the country? How do we still make it special for our daughter with the new situation both financially and in terms of how many people will be allowed for parties?
◊ Will we be able to have a large party with 200+ people?
◊ Can we hold hands for the horah or will we all be holding napkins? Can we all be tightly packed on a dance floor?
◊ Will family be able to join us from other states?
◊ I worry about whether or not we will actually be able to gather a large group safely.
One thing we know for sure: we’re all in this together. Mitzvah Market will be here every step of the way to help you plan a memorable Bar or Bat Mitzvah.
If you haven’t joined one of our 17 regional Facebook planning groups, join here.
