January 10th, 2023
There’s something that makes the party you’ve been planning for a year become so real once you drop the paper invitations in the mailbox or hit send on an online invitation. Suddenly you have invited everyone you know to your big event. It’s like the moment after you give birth and only you know that you had the baby. But once you announce it, it’s the world’s information.
With online invites, everyone knows instantaneously! With paper invites, you can’t see when people receive them and only know they received them once they respond. Either way, oh my gosh! What an adrenaline rush!
I don’t know why, but when we put our invites in the mail, it made it all so real and I freaked out. It’s like ok, this is happening. Before it was a concept, but now I’m inviting people to a place at a time and once they say yes it has to happen.
The excitement grew as people started to text me with words of encouragement and happy responses! Yikes!! It’s real! It’s exciting and it means our mitzvah is coming. Yay! But it also means that the hourglass has officially turned over and with every proverbial grain of sand that falls, it’s a day closer to the big day. It’s such a combination of nerves and joy! It means that you now have a limited time to cross all your T’s and dot all your I’s. It also means starting to get guest counts and placing your orders.
As responses roll in, you go through the emotional rollercoaster of people whom you want to say no saying yes and vice versa. It’s politics and gossip and friend groups. It’s best friend texts and cohort group texts and leaning on your friends also going through the same exciting time. It’s following up on RSVPs with awkward conversations (seriously, how hard is it to just RESPOND) and starting to think about table sizes and seating.
At this rate, the excitement builds like an avalanche and the butterflies in your stomach take over in full force!
Once our invitations went out, I felt like screaming “game on”. It was similar to when August 1st rolls around and I realize we have one month left of summer until school begins again. It’s like you have all the time in the world until a tangible marker comes around to flick you in the forehead and remind you time is ticking!
Suddenly, you feel the crunch. The hustle. The need to get stuff checked off your list.
It’s a very exciting feeling, and as a parent, it’s overwhelming because you’re focusing on all the tiny details, but also wanting to support your kid. There’s all the fun stuff with the party but also the important stuff like studying, speech writing, and practicing. It’s hard to not get taken over by the fun of the party and forgetting that the service is the important part. It will arguably be the most important day of your child’s life up to this point, but I will be the first to admit it’s easy to lose focus and get so caught up in the minutiae of a big fat sparkly dance party.
Of course, everything will be perfect, and in truth, anything that’s missed will only be noticed by you. I keep trying to come back to that for a little bit of perspective. The good news is, as things pop up in your mind at 2am while you lay in bed, you can easily order them in the morning. Even better with online shipping being so quick, the “homestretch crunch” is more like 72 hours before your event.
I keep saying if I stop now and do nothing more, everything will be perfect. I keep thinking these last few weeks are like the different knobs on a pair of binoculars. I’ve already turned the big one to get everything into focus. Now I just need to fine-tune things to get them all set and clear. It’s just so exciting to be going through the motions, knowing that the end result will be this beautiful (hopefully) ceremony and amazing (hopefully) party that we’ve been looking forward to since the day my daughter was born. Even if we decided not to do a montage.
Stacey Wallenstein is the founder of the parenting & lifestyle blog The Mint Chip Mama. Visit her website at themintchipmama.com and find her across all socials at @themintchipmama
January 3rd, 2023
I recently spent the afternoon with my six-year-old at the Central Park Children’s Zoo. He is my bonus suburb baby and the only one of my three children who was neither born in nor lived in Manhattan. As I watched him happily play on the spider web for an hour, I was transported to another lifetime. To my other lifetime. To my previous life as a first-time “girl” mom living in Manhattan.
Who was that person? Who was that young, wrinkle-free chick who had everything she needed Tetris-ed into the bottom of her stroller, prepared for Armageddon – if it was within walking distance?
I swear, I simply no longer remember her.
I used to live in Manhattan. I used to have a kid in Manhattan. I used to walk with her everywhere in a stroller. We used to go to The Met every weekend, pet animals at The Art Farm, go to classes at Jodi’s Gym, and sing with Miss Terri at Music Together. I used to dress my daughter in (hand me down) pinafores. We intimately knew every park in a forty-block radius. I was even that mom who had three phones going the day after Labor Day to land a coveted application for an interview to apply for a coveted spot in an Upper East Side nursery school (yes, all the stories are true. Yes, it’s that insane).
Where has the time gone? Where have the days gone when my life was just walking to the zoo to sit with a friend while our kids played on this very spider web?
Again, I swear, I simply no longer remember.
Since those priceless moments – that felt long but now I see were short – I have brought two more children into this world, moved to the suburbs, and started a suburban life. It’s a good life, but one could argue it’s like leaving Earth and moving to Mars. Yes, we still go into “the city” all the time but it’s not the same. In fact, every time we “go in”, I am reminded that “the Earth” keeps spinning despite us getting off of it.
So where does this leave me? Well at this moment, it leaves me overly sentimental and wistful as I’m approaching said pinafore-wearing girl child’s Bat Mitzvah… while the goats roll their eyes at me.
I miss the days when we all just had our first kids and met in Central Park. The days of new moms’ groups and looking to make new (geographically desirable) friends. I remember thinking it was like freshman year of college, but instead of comparing dorm room posters and modem speeds, we compared large wheeled urban strollers and diaper bags.
We nursed together in the park wearing hooter hiders, or just gave up and embraced it feeling like naughty nudists to appease our hysterical babies. We discussed breast milk vs. formula and homemade baby food vs. jarred food. What is BPA? I don’t know, but I’m told it’s bad…
We walked up and down the Esplanade so our babies would fall asleep praying for the smallest moment of peace in our day or just one simple second so we could go to the bathroom. We thanked our doormen for opening our doors and praised restaurants on 2nd Avenue for outdoor seating, a clean highchair, and a kid’s menus. There were hugs and smiles and happiness. There were fat chubby thighs we’d bite, first foods, first words, first steps. There were moms’ nights out discussing parenting styles and potty training and the stress of being a new mom. Slowly, we all gained our footing and our conversations evolved into apartment size constraints, and if it was that bad to have a cup of coffee while pregnant with our second baby since we were so exhausted from also dealing with a toddler.
Naturally, that led to saying goodbye to our wolf pack as families organically moved to Long Island, New Jersey, Connecticut, or farther away. These women were my support system. These amazing humans were my newest and yet my closest friends at a time when my world was turned upside down. The upside down only a new mom understands when you’re given this charge, and yet no manual. What would I have done without these women, my first-time mom friends? My g-d – what would I have done without them (I’m not crying, you’re crying).
We have shared in each other’s triumphs, moves, family expansions, and more since the beginning of our becoming families. We’ve shared over a decade of Time-Hops on Facebook of Halloween pictures and park playdates. We’ve commented on the size of said babies now with whom we sang The Hello song for nine semesters. We all still look the same (minus wrinkles and grey hair) but these fat little babies have grown up.
It means the world to me that I am still in touch with so many of these moms whom I consider “being in the trenches with” a lifetime ago. The moms whose shoulders I cried on and who cried on mine as we discussed when our babies would sleep through the night or when teething would end. Every little thing seemed so big back then – because it was to us.
But we are no longer pushing each other’s babies on swings. We are now dancing at their Bar and Bat Mitzvahs.
What a gift to have friends like this where thirteen years have gone by, and we’ve watched each other’s beautiful children grow up. We’ve watched them grow into big versions of the little babies they once were. These friends whom I used to sit with on this exact bench at the Central Park Zoo – while our babies played on the very same spider web as my son, a lifetime later.
Stacey Wallenstein is the founder of the parenting & lifestyle blog The Mint Chip Mama. Visit her website at themintchipmama.com and find her across all socials at @themintchipmama
December 29th, 2022
2022 was a year like no other- emerging out of the COVID-19 pandemic and back into our new normal, we saw the incorporation of new trends and themes into every aspect of our lives, including how we throw parties. Building off of 2022 trends, forecasters and experts in food, design, and fashion, from platforms such as Instagram and Pinterest, are letting us in on what may be popular in the next year. We’ve scoured the internet to find you the hottest predicted trends of 2023 and how to integrate them into your B Mitzvah party.
Fashion:
In 2023, fashion will continue to follow the recent revival of late 90s and early aughts styles, with classic girly elements gaining popularity for people of all genders. Dainty design, flowy fabrics, lace, ruffles, and fringe are bringing the comfy loungewear aesthetic of the COVID era into a post-pandemic world, prioritizing style without compromising on comfort. In short, clothing with fun colors, patterns, and textures will be high on people’s lists.
And this isn’t just for girls, either. Menswear too is seeing a rise in styles that are typically considered feminine, with mainstream celebrities like Harry Styles, Brad Pitt, Pete Davidson, and more donning dresses and feminine clothing at shows and red carpets. More than anything, the fashion trends of the coming year(s) will emphasize dressing in a unique and unabashed way rather than focusing on just one style or design.
Design:
Just like in the last few years, eco-friendly and low-waste design is a rising priority for many, especially for the youngest generations. This can be seen literally in the use of recycled and DIY design elements, or more creatively in the popularity of patterns like mushroom print.
Speaking of DIY, paper crafts are set to make a huge comeback this year. Lace or fabric trims, 3D layering, and other such designs can be incorporated into your invitations, seating charts, sign-in board, or can even be a fun crafting station at a party.
Of course, the Pantone Color of the Year always sets the tone for color palettes and can help bring any party into the current day. Check out our recent article about this year’s color, Viva Magenta, for inspiration.
Finally, rave-style pieces are more popular than ever. After years stuck inside, neon, bright colors, pop music, and big dance parties are seeing a renaissance. This trend takes all the classic B Mitzvah party elements and cranks them up 10!
Food:
Lucky for us Mitzvah planners, non-alcoholic drinks and mocktails are going to have their moment this year. With the demand for these types of beverages ticking up, it’ll be easier than ever to let your mind run wild with ideas for signature drinks that people of all ages can enjoy.
2023 will also be a year of expanding your palate. Instagram trend forecasters found that more than ⅔ of Gen Z enjoy using social media as a means to explore different cultures through cuisine and food. As platforms like TikTok continue to produce viral moments from around the world, this trend is sure to continue as more young people are exposed to ideas and content from around the world. Try incorporating something brand new into your party menu for all of your guests to enjoy!
December 22nd, 2022
You clapped! You clapped!
You clapped and it worked!
Thank you!
If you recall, I found the perfect dress for my daughter’s Bat Mitzvah only to open the box upon arrival and find enclosed the wrong item. Worsened more by the glaring “sold out” sign on the website that pierced my eyes as I gasped for air.
There were tears. There was yelling. There was asking to speak to someone’s manager.
Since it was the holiday season, I asked everyone to clap to help me believe. I would find this dress.
Your clapping worked! This angel got her wings – or better yet, HER DRESS!
I can’t believe it; I have the dress.
I have the dress and it is GORGEOUS and perfect. It fits and looks even better than I imagined. It doesn’t need an inch of alteration.
But the story of how it happened is even better.
In an ironic twist, the moment my last article went up, I received an email from the store telling me how “hard” they tried but they just couldn’t find the dress. Sorry. Life stinks. We tried hard, chin up. I’m a man, I don’t understand how hard it is to find the perfect dress. Yadda Yadda.
Noooo. But it was the dress. It was my dress. Don’t you see, man? I wouldn’t even need to get a new bra. This was a unicorn, this was perfection. This was MY dress. I could never find a good dress, and this was the winner.
Don’t you see, Mr. Customer Service Manager? I was sitting on my couch upset thinking no, you do not see, and I do not accept this verdict.
There must be a way to find this dress. I mean – it’s not like I was searching for triple white Jordans from 2020. This was a current dress in a current color. I did not accept that it vaporized. I did not accept it was over. I believed it could be found.
Furthermore, if you can’t believe in miracles during the holiday season, what good are you?
I started singing “You Will Be Found” from Dear Evan Hansen, with the added verse, “Dear fancy department store customer service manager… You may not understand the rage and perseverance of a mother trying to find a dress for her daughter’s Bat Mitzvah.”
Yeah, he didn’t care.
So, I decided to take out the unnecessary and useless “middleman” and start searching for a way to get to the brand (speaking of, maybe if it was a middle WOman, she would have felt my pain and tried harder).
I am a woman who roars. I’m taking this into my own hands.
It’s Hammer Time. Mama’s taking over the reins. You Can’t Touch This.
I search and I search.
Clap Clap Clap
I think – what would Cher Horowitz do? What would Kelly Taylor do? What would Jessie Spano do? Then it comes to me. Much like these trailblazing women I have resources. I’m a blogger and I work with brands all day. I must be able to get to this company somehow.
Clap Clap
It worked. You believed. I believed. I’d like to think if the above pioneering feminist icons were actual, real people, they too would have believed.
I found the brand. I found the correct contact person- my Clarence, my angel.
The clapping got all the way to Manhattan, then bounced to Seattle, and finally to a warehouse in Los Angeles where someone, somewhere FOUND MY DRESS!
Not only did they find it, but they went above and beyond to get me the right size. They were beyond amazing to deal with, not to mention they loved the concept that they were summoned by clapping.
The dress arrived and it was just perfect. It WAS actually in the box this time.
I’m so grateful that Chanukah is eight nights long. I have the dress,I have the story. Now I just need… the shoes. Because let’s be honest… It takes a miracle to find comfortable (and cute) shoes!
Ugh, but that’s another post.
Keep clapping.
KEEP CLAPPING!
Stacey Wallenstein is the founder of the parenting & lifestyle blog The Mint Chip Mama. Visit her website at themintchipmama.com and find her across all socials at @themintchipmama
December 20th, 2022
Today’s youth are more environmentally conscious than ever, with reports emerging that sustainability and environmentalism are the most important issue to the youngest generations. Tweens who are preparing for a B Mitzvah have a lot on their plate, and many are searching for easy ways to make their big days as eco-friendly as possible. Here are some great brands and products that promote sustainability without compromising on style:
1.Seed Paper Kippot
Kippot (yarmulkes) are a staple handout at a B Mitzvah service, and are often personalized with a B Mitzvah teen’s name or theme. With seed paper kippot, you can make this sacred item even more special- by growing flowers with it! Circles of Life kippot are completely customizable AND biodegradable, packed with the seeds of your choice, from wildflowers, to herbs, and even vegetables! They’ll look beautiful worn on the head, and even more beautiful once in the ground! They not only look good, but they do good, too.
2.Eco Gift Bags
Everyone loves to give and receive gifts, but knowing the gift bag might end up in a landfill can be a bummer. Simple Eco Solutions makes beautiful reusable bags that are perfect for giving a gift to a green-thumbed teen, or for a B Mitzvah family to distribute swag bags at the end of the night. The bags come in tons of sizes, colors, and designs, and even come with an erasable chalkboard tag to write on!
3.Recycled Judaica
Judaica is a necessity for certain aspects of a B Mitzvah, and many of the ornate and special objects can be made in responsible and conscious ways. Artist Harriete Estel Berman makes a variety of stunning and unique pieces from recycled tin cans, from candlesticks to tzedakah boxes and everything in between. Likewise, Fair Trade Judaica boasts gorgeous art from around the world that is “crafted with Jewish values”. They host an entire section of their website specifically for Judaica made from recycled materials.
Candlesticks by Harriete Estel Berman
In this day and age, having an environmentally conscious B Mitzvah is easier than ever before. Whether you’re seeking a unique and sustainable piece to add to your special day, or looking to buy a gift for a B Mitzvah teen in your life, the options are truly endless!
December 19th, 2022
We are two months out from my daughter’s Bat Mitzvah. I know the scramble is on the horizon, so I am trying to check off as many boxes as I can now to help myself later.
There are a few things I can do to get ahead of myself and prepare in advance so that when it becomes crunch time, I remember I have a “go bag” already done for something.
Today, this means the bathroom basket for the ladies’ room.
I do not know about you, but I have always loved this little gifted oasis of emergency saviors and pilferable toiletries. Yes, I have seven thousand hair bands at home, but the ones on that card always look so exciting and inviting. Bobby pins, yes – I need them. I mean I do not, I do not use them, do not need them… but now that I see three hundred on a card, I must have a few… because they are there.
It is always fun to go through this basket. It is always fun to see how a proposed party crisis is managed in lavatory swag. Are you with me?
I will say that when I think of these fun little loot bins, my mind always comes back to the pinnacle of 80’s and 90’s glam – the hair spray. More often than not, I think of Aqua Net. The gold standard used by “Hair Bands” gracing the cover of your Power Ballad or “Lost in Love” CDs (obviously ordered from a tv commercial or 800 number) and your friend’s cool older sister.
But do kids or adults still use hair spray? I do not, but to be fair, I never really did. Or at least did successfully…
As a teenager in the 90’s (my Bat Mitzvah was in 1991), I spent more time dealing with my perm and bangs than anything else. (At this point, I would like to pause so you can close your eyes and smell a perm). I never quite got the gist of hairspray (or successful bangs), but I always wanted to be that girl who could. At the time, that meant the simultaneous flat-down, and flip-up look. Using hair spray was a status symbol (not really) and one I aspired to master. I will not mention the clear braces or pimples that accompanied this look to keep a little bit of a mystery alive.
My Grandma was a hair spray master. You could find her walking through a windstorm and her hair would not budge. It was also always perfectly “quaffed” at a salon and frozen into place. There may be a direct correlation between the hole in the ozone layer and this generation, but my gosh, that hair did not move. I remember she used the brand VO5. That was her jam. I also remember that when they changed the formula, it caused a “code red” throughout our family resulting in a mad rush to everyone’s nearest pharmacy to stock her up with the OG.
So where does that leave me for a 2023 party? What do people put in this basket now, when tweens and teens have perfectly slick hair, no frizz, and dresses that look like band-aids? Well – like all good moms in this decade do, I started with google. Luckily, in just a few seconds, I found the perfect article of what to put in said basket right here.
Copied and pasted into notes, I headed to the store and picked up all these shelf-stable accouterments. Anticipating this, I saved a gift basket that I could repurpose for this exact moment. Finally, I was off like Little Red Riding Hood to fill her up and then put it aside until duty called (she bows for the pun).
I love drug stores and sample-size things. Like, too much. I always find it fun to see what companies can make in small sizes. For this reason, making a basket was one of the Bat Mitzvah tasks I really enjoyed. It is also easy and quick and does not involve an email or phone call.
As I browsed the list, I noticed hair spray was in fact absent from it and laughed. Much like The Clapper, and EG Socks, I guess the world has moved on. But then I saw it on the shelf… that beautiful purple bottle of Aqua Net, with the same mesh design, aerosol spray, and white cap. It made me smile and thus, I debated if it was needed. I thought of my daughter saying “ew mom, no one uses hair spray, you’re so cringe” (her usual comment no matter what I say these days), but then with the rebellious moxie of Cindy Lauper, I threw it in my basket.
I know when the moment comes at the party, and someone needs something from this basket, it is more likely to be Tylenol or an antacid. However, I also have faith that this little bottle of hair spray will make someone else smile – and even at the same moment as the DJ plays some good 80s pop.
More importantly, this moment brought back a really nice memory of my grandma – who we will honor at my daughter’s Bat Mitzvah.
I am finding as I move through all the planning and minutia for this epic event, I am reminded of so many parallel things from my own Bat Mitzvah. Things since forgotten that were meaningful to me. So, if hair spray made me smile and think about my grandma, and someone gets to score some new hair ties, the party is already a win.
Now who is going to make her a memory glass?
Stacey Wallenstein is the founder of the parenting & lifestyle blog The Mint Chip Mama. Visit her website at themintchipmama.com and find her across all socials at @themintchipmama
December 13th, 2022
For Brooke’s Bat Mitzvah, she wanted to let loose and go wild- literally. When her family settled on the Bronx Zoo as the venue for the big day, The Event of a Lifetime’s Melisa Imberman knew it would be a huge undertaking to transform the zoo into a glamorous party space. So she, Brooke, and Brooke’s mom skipped the monkey business and got straight to work turning the Bronx Zoo into the Brooke Zoo, branding it “Wild About Brooke”.
Starting with the rustic open air Dancing Crane Pavilion, walls were created with piping and drapes. The final enclosed space was an unrecognizable and intimate area- even the concrete ground was laid with plush and cozy carpet, creating the perfect blank canvas for the Best time of My Life.
Before & after
Before the party began, Brooke and her family were escorted around the zoo on a cart to visit some of the animal residents, brandishing their on-theme purple umbrellas to stay dry from some passing showers.
As guests arrived, they were directed to the party space by branded signs, opting to either be carted to the party or enjoy a scenic walk through the sprawling zoo.
Entering the party, guests stepped into a whole new world adorned with lush greenery and Brooke’s signature purple and silver color scheme. The immaculately decorated dance floor was like a luxury jungle paradise, complete with wild peacocks roaming free around the space.
As adults enjoyed hors d’oeuvres overlooking the Flamingo Pond, kids settled into the VIP lounge to play pop-a-shot and choose from a variety of temporary tattoos. Adults and kids alike were delighted to get the party started by taking a spin on the iconic Bronx Zoo carousel.
After cocktail hour, the dance floor was officially opened, inviting guests in for a night of wild dancing and celebration. Signature drinks for both adults and the under-21s had party animals of all ages feeling fierce.
Brooke’s theme could be seen subtly placed throughout the party, from the beautiful floral bouquets to the animal print embossed tablecloths and pleather lounge furniture. With the swing photo booth, guests captured the magic of the night and took home unforgettable memories!
Towards the end of the night, black lights came on and the tamed party became a wild neon fantasy party, complete with glowsticks, glowing temporary tattoos, cotton candy, and more.
Kids collected their swag in the form of a super soft sweatshirt and sporty bag. As guests awaited the shuttle, they were surprised with a little something extra- a “Starbrookes” station and branded reusable cup to be filled with their favorite drink for the ride home. Everyone also got a brownie cookie, aptly named a Brookie, to enjoy on the way home.
After partying hard all night long, visitors to the Brooke Zoo couldn’t stop talking about the elephant in the room: how fantastic the celebration had been! For the Bat Mitzvah girl, it was truly the wildest night of her life, hands (or paws) down.
Photography by Chad David Kraus
December 6th, 2022
The 2023 Pantone Color of the Year has been announced as Viva Magenta, a warm and vibrant pinkish red. The Color of the Year is meant to set the tone for the year to come, as well as predict style trends and design. Incorporating the Color of the Year is an easy and subtle way to modernize and brighten your B Mitzvah celebration. Keep reading for ideas and inspiration on how to bring this color into your big day.
Lulu’s
Fashion is always an easy place to start when looking to bring a certain color to life, and luckily, magenta is already a hue that’s popular in B Mitzvahs. It lends itself well to sparkle and glamor. Check out Frankie’s on the Park for some pink-inspired fashions.
Pinterest
Don’t want to commit to a full fuchsia fit? Accessories like nail polish, jewelry, or shoes can make an outfit pop without stealing the show. Get yourself some custom magenta party shoes from Rebootz to dance the night away in.
Pinterest
Florals are an obvious way to tie in magenta at your party since so many flowers are already in this color family. Don’t be afraid to go for bold and bright flowers, as they can really breathe life into any space. For those in the Boston area, Bloom Floral can help bring your vision to life!
Pinterest
What’s a celebration without balloons? Add a *pop* of pink to your balloon arch or bouquet for a fun and whimsical look. Check out Big Balloon Bash for some more inspiration.
Etsy
Candles are a quintessential part of a B Mitzvah, whether you’re doing a candle lighting ceremony or just saying Havdallah before the party starts. Light the room up, literally, with some magenta candles, like the above ones from Etsy.
Amazon
Finally, once the big planning aspects are out of the way, you can focus on the fun, silly things like the pictured liquid-activated ice cubes from Amazon. There are a million little things you can find in magenta that will tie together the entire party. For more ideas on the endless possibilities, check out our favorite vendors that specialize in favors and novelty items.
November 29th, 2022
As the mother of the Bat Mitzvah girl, my dress is both important, not important, and complex. I did not want to start shopping for my dress until my daughter decided on her dress. This is for many reasons – color theme, level of fanciness, and of course, to not overshadow her on her special day.
This is the first time I have been the “mother of” and it has been a weird identity to embody. I did not want a dress that is sexy. Neither did I want a dress too plain. Furthermore, I did not want to look matronly, because at 44 I still have some parts not completely given in to gravity.
So, my search began as my daughter honed in on her choice. Her theme is space, and the dress we found for her miraculously embodies the night sky in a garment.
Now it was my turn. Game on.
Navy. Got it.
I’m short, so a gown is a bit of a challenge. But I am the “mother of”, so I am supposed to be in a gown for our Saturday night “cocktail attire” affair, right? Um… I don’t know. It seems like that’s correct.
Wait – I have only shopped online for the last two years. How do I buy myself a gown? Or a regular dress? Or leave my house and go to one of those places I remember where you give money and walk out with an item RIGHT THERE?
I can do this. I used to love to shop. Especially for pretty things that made me feel nice. But also wait… do dresses make me feel nice or like my body is grossly out of proportion with my R-rated top and size 4T hips, all atop my statuesque 5’2” frame.
I forgot how challenging dress shopping was for me. I’ve come to peace with the fact that even the suggestion of a strapless bra makes me weep. I know at this point – after a prom dress, wedding dress, and multiple bridesmaid dresses, what works and doesn’t for my body. Once more I will say NO I cannot wear a strapless bra. Just believe me. Please.
Thus, I began searching for the perfect dressy enough, age-appropriate, petite navy dress that will hide bra straps and not make me look like a troll. Because let’s remember: this is the dress I will stand in and smile with pride as my progeny becomes a woman. No one is looking at me. Or they are… you know, to judge my dress. No stress there at all.
So, where did I begin? I asked my friends where to go and they suggested starting at the “outlet” version of a finer department store. YES! I remember loving this store and doing so well many years before for my 40th birthday dress. Yes, yes yes. I just know my perfect dress is there.
After hours and hours of trying on quite possibly every dress in the posh East Egg zip code, I looked on the website to see the expanded choices. I found my favorite in-store choice – which fit perfectly but was too simple as a hostess dress – in an all-sequin version.
Oh my gosh.
THIS WAS THE DRESS.
I already knew it fit, I already loved it, I just needed a little extra oomph. There it was – staring me right in the face, and at the unbelievable price of $59.97. I ordered it (in two sizes, just to be safe) faster than I could say “bargain”. Not to mention it was midi size, so my petit frame required no alteration. It lifted where it needed to, draped in the right places, and just made me look – perfect.
I did it! I bought the dress, the PERFECT dress, plus I could return it if needed. This was a big deal for this sartorial indecisive woman in a land where most “mother of” dresses were final sale.
I left with a spring in my step and happily packed for my business conference. A week later I returned to find the delivery bag on my floor holding the answer to my dress prayers. But I didn’t have a chance to open it yet since I was getting ready for unexpected sinus surgery.
In a fog for the next week, I kept looking forward to opening the bag, seeing this amazing dress, and finalizing the fifth outfit for our big Bat Mitzvah event.
Finally, I felt well enough to get out of bed. I ran right to the bag, yanked open the top, and staring back at me was…. A black cardigan.
Wait what? Where’s my dress? WHERE’S MY DRESS!!!?
NOOOOO!
I head right to the website to re-order it. But of course, staring back at me – SOLD OUT.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
WHERE’S MY DRESS? The answer? Only g-d knows. After an hour on the phone with said “finer” department store’s customer service manager the whereabouts of my dress – now OF COURSE completely sold out – was nowhere to be found.
He offered an apology and a 10% discount on another dress but that did not help. Nothing existed like this unicorn. Not even close. The next option – barely even close to the look I wanted, was several hundred dollars. Not helpful. Not ok. You messed up, just send me that dress. I’ll make it work. Nope. No dice. Sorry lady. Tough luck.
I said there must be ONE dress. SOMEWHERE! Find IT! I’ll hold. I’ll hold until you find it. Just go.
After 25 minutes, he advised that they possibly have one… in a store… somewhere in the country. He sent out a dress APB to this manager and assured me we would hear back within the day and email me.
Naturally, that didn’t happen. I have not heard back. I have no information and no perfect dress.
So, I need a Chanukah miracle. I need to see that email and a tracking number and know my perfect, beautiful, navy sequin dress has been located and will be at my door to shine in February.
But I don’t expect this will actually happen, so what do I do? I order every single navy dress for sale in a store at this very moment. I spend thousands and thousands of dollars having gowns, midi dresses, and cocktail dresses from all parts of the country sent to my door. But none are my dress. None are that dress. Even worse – none are $59.97.
I am so sad.
I am so frustrated.
I am so angry that this store known for their exemplary customer service didn’t and couldn’t do any better.
Yes, I understand in the scheme of things this should be my biggest problem. I am thankful that I even get to have this problem, but I need a Chanukah miracle. I need that dress. Clap with me. Make the dream come true. Help me believe.
Stacey Wallenstein is the founder of the parenting & lifestyle blog The Mint Chip Mama. Visit her website at themintchipmama.com and find her across all socials at @themintchipmama
November 29th, 2022
With winter approaching fast, we’re gearing up to hunker down- and thousands of B Mitzvah kids across the country are getting ready for the day of their lives. While a traditional Bar or Bat Mitzvah gift is usually a piece of jewelry or Judaica, some tweens desire something a little out of the box. A little cold weather won’t freeze out the celebration, so we’ve made a list of the hottest gifts for teens this season that will make them feel warm and fuzzy, both inside and out.
P.S: Check out our guide explaining why 18 is the magic number for B Mitzvah gifts.
1. Ugg Slippers
The classic Australian boot company has been a winter staple for decades, and their slippers have recently come back into style. Pick from an array of styles and colors, like the Coquette style that’s popular with celebrities.
Original photo from Ugg.com
2. Instant film camera
In an age of smartphones and instant gratification, most teens have never known the experience of using a film camera. Give them the best of both worlds with a classic instant film camera, such as this one from Instax that prints film pictures on the spot. Perfect for a teen with an artistic spirit, plus it comes in tons of sizes and colors.
Original photo from Instax
3. TikTok cookbook
TikTok is a favorite pastime of many teens, and viral recipes have gained huge traction since the app became popular. Give the gift of creativity and inspiration to the budding baker or chef having a B Mitzvah so they can make cozy recipes to keep them warm all winter long. The Unofficial TikTok Cookbook can be found on Amazon.
Original photo from Amazon
4. Projector Set
Who doesn’t love to cuddle up in front of the TV on a cold winter day? Your B Mitzvah teen can have their own screen set up wherever they choose to lounge! The TMY Projector Set comes with a screen and WIFI enabled projector that can be moved around from room to room, making everywhere and anywhere a personal movie theater.
Original photo from Amazon
5. Sunset Lamp
Though daylight is shorter this time of year, you can make it feel like the sun is shining right in your own home. A B Mitzvah teen will love this sunset lamp that brings a warm and glowing ambience to the cold and dark winter days. Turn their bedroom into a tropical escape, even on the coldest days.
Original photo from Rose Lives Loves
6. Raspberry Pi
Got a tech lover who’s looking to pass the time this winter? Get them a Raspberry Pi, a small personal computer that users can program to do a variety of things. The small yet mighty device is perfect for a teen looking to try their hand at programming and will spark inspiration in any budding engineer.
Original photo from Raspberry Pi
7. Yogibo
Lounge around in style with the popular and incredibly comfortable Yogibo beanbags. From supportive pillows, to cozy blankets, to huge beanbag chairs, there’s something for everyone. Movie night just got a lot more comfortable!
Original photo from Yogibo
8. Comfy
First came the Snuggie, and now the Comfy has taken over. The wearable blanket comes in a variety of colors and styles, meaning there’s a perfect poncho for even the pickiest teens. Your B Mitzvah teen will love cozying up in their Comfy on a snow day or even at their friends’ outdoor sports games.
Original photo from Yogibo
