By Cindy Silvert, www.easybreezygourmet.com
I’m thinking of putting up a tent in the backyard for a classy garden brunch after shul. Two gentlemen arrived to give estimates for said tent. Their demeanors, suggestions and quotes couldn’t have been more different.
Gentleman A was a middle aged professional type who’s been in the business for years. He was most pleasant and even had a measuring tape! He emailed me a detailed layout an hour after he dropped in and an official estimate arrived the next day. So why can’t I get past the fact that he was wearing dress shoes with a casual get up? I’m talking dark loafers and Italian socks, with khakis!
I know what you’re thinking: How long has this girl been married? By which you mean one of two things: a) who’s the lucky fella? or b) you’re telling me her husband dresses any better?!
Anyhoo, it’s not that I think he’s evil or anything… but if it were an after school special, the kind where you’re supposed to watch out for incongruities that tip you off as to who’s responsible for the heinous crime in Black Bottom Creek… Oh, never mind.
Gentlman B was at least a decade my junior (oh, who am I kidding, I could have been his grandmother). He drove for two hours to look at my backyard for approximately five minutes to tell me I needed half the tent Gentlman A had recommended. Thankfully, his socks & shoes were a lovely match and even complimented his compliment of piercings, which incidentally, matched my son’s new eraser collection. But I digress. (Moi?) It’s not that I have an age or experience or even a piercing bias, it’s just this: He drove four hours total, spent five minutes scoping the joint and gave me one, teeny weeny (highly informative) single page brochure. So why the ninety pound supersized briefcase? For what purpose, pray tell? The dead body? (Yes, from Black Bottom Creek) Piercing apparatus? Lots and lots of low fat muffins? (Young man, you’re hired!)
If I were a betting man, which of course I’m not, I’d go for door number one. Why? (Not why am I not a betting man, silly, why would I assume that an older guy who can send an email is more reliable than someone who walks around with a body bag?) Cause! Am I right? Isn’t that who you would choose?
But here’s the thing: Gentleman B is probably right. And even if he’s not, I’d rather have a squishy-rockin’-good-time-fits-like-spandex-party-of-a-tent than a when-are-all-the-guests-going-to-get-here-and-fill-up-this-graveyard sort of tent. Also, (and I use the term loosely) name one Italian designer that doesn’t believe in the oversized valise.
Do I share any of this with my husband? Do I cap the number of tent estimates just when it’s getting good? Why do I even want a tent? Speaking of which, are Victor and Nicky still in love? This and much more, next time…
About Cindy Silvert
Cindy Lynn Silvert took the long route to the States from Canada via Israel, where she studied, worked and had her first two children. A lover of the Arts, Cindy is a professionally trained actor, prolific artist and writer. She has designed educational software, curricula and museums exhibits in addition to editing two books. She writes for a number of sites including easybreezygourmet.com where she shares culinary secrets, shortcuts and tips. She is also a featured chef and lead contributor of metroimma.com.
Follow Cindy’s new blog Eat Pray Save, right here on MitzvahMarket.com as she challenges the status quo all the way to the Bimah, while planning her son’s upcoming Bar Mitzvah. Eat Pray Save will be the place to get a fresh perspective and a classy, yet fun and affordable solution to the out of control phenomenon of the American Bar Mitzvah.
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